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They are also raised with strong family and community values, so there is a sense of responsibility and accountability for others, not just for the self.American culture raises children to be fiercely independent and to look out for ‘number one’.In fact, you may be experiencing attractions of deprivation, where you try to recreate the issues from childhood in your romantic partners.It is so funny to see how some social behaviors are exactly the same between France and the US, and others are completely different. Well, this was a big shock to me when I arrived in the US. I understood of course a man and a woman could be interested in each other in a romantic way, let me reassure you.The dynamic may or may not move into a serious relationship, but they are not trying to gather other options or back up plans in case it doesn’t. Americans (both men and women) have been socialized to play games, to act unavailable, to wait a particular amount of time before texting back…There are a set of ritualized rules that are abided by in American dating culture, and if you don’t play within them, you are labeled as desperate or needy or undesirable.
With European men, if there’s mutual interest, they keep seeing that person and don’t keep hunting for better options simultaneously. Nor will they freak out when discussions of commitment or future come up.They grow up developing friendships with the opposite sex and in turn, develop more empathy and understanding of the opposite sex.In American culture, there is a clear segregation of the sexes, boys play with boys and do boy things and girls do the same.However, if a woman is dining with a man, you can bet he will pick up the check. I usually trick them by asking to be excused (as if I was going to the lady’s room, grab the waiter and give him my credit card).But I would never do that to my Dad who would be very upset if I did. When I meet a man and I am without my husband, I’ll place within the first minutes of the conversation that “my husband blablabla… That usually is enough to make my state of mind really clear.
In France, it’s very common for a girl to go out to dinner with a male friend.