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Instead, I view being open about my journey as a privilege I extend to a potential partner.Their reaction will determine whether or not I want them to be in my life." The sex educator known as Laureen HD added that "potential partners tend to ask 'what happened? And a common mistake -- at least, I consider it a mistake -- that people with herpes make is to feel that they owe potential partners an explanation on how they contracted herpes, as if contracting it from a cheating boyfriend versus from a one night stand makes a difference.But a lot of trial and error later, I figured I would rather be rejected while having done the right thing than accepted but having neglected their consent.

"A once-daily preventive medication called Pr EP is now available for people who are in a relationship with someone who is HIV-positive," Alberda said.

"Depending on your preference and your feelings about the person you're dating, you may want to lead with your STI status or not.

Either approach is OK, but not disclosing your status as sexual activity becomes clearly imminent is not OK." In other words, you don't need to have this conversation on your first date (unless you want to), but you should absolutely tell your partner before you become sexually intimate with them.

"It's super important to make your STI status known prior to having sex with someone new," sex educator Heather Alberda said.

"Setting the stage for healthy communication starts on day one." Josh Robbins, an HIV/AIDS activist and spokesman for another dating website, Dating Positives.com, said that "all you can do is be safe.

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"We also know now that if viral loads are undetectable, HIV is unable to be passed along to a partner." Sex therapist Michael Vigorito explained, "Studies show a decrease in HIV infections associated with two medical advances: taking a pre-exposure prophylaxis (Pr EP) for those who are HIV negative and 'undetectable = untransmittable' for those who are positive.

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